I cherish the following quote by author Leo Buscaglia, who was famous for writing about love.
“I am so sorry I cannot be a banana. I would love to be a banana if I could for you, but I’m a peach.” ~ Leo Buscaglia
My mother had introduced me to this quote when I was just a young girl. She was trying to remind me to always love myself the way I am.
We may find it difficult at times to just be ourselves, to tell the truth, or to live our truth.
We may worry what people think, but it often comes down to what we think of ourselves.
It helps to ask yourself these questions:
- Do I accept and embrace my weaknesses and imperfections?
- Do I appreciate my strengths and gifts?
- Do I have reasonable expectations of myself?
- Do I forgive myself for past failures or mistakes (whether real or perceived)?
If you have things about yourself that you find difficult to accept or love, you’re not alone. You may not realize the following fact:
You are lovable just the way you are – just because you are HERE.
The truth is, it is NEVER too late to start accepting yourself and loving yourself.
That means loving yourself no matter where you are in your life, what’s happened in your past, or what you look like.
And that doesn’t mean you’re giving up.
It means you are giving yourself the self-compassion you need, the fuel you need, to be the happiest, healthiest “peach”, “plum”, or “banana” you can be. :)
Here are some tips to get you started:
4 Tips for Loving & Accepting Yourself
1. Know Yourself Well – How can you accept what you don’t know? You can start by writing down all of your strengths AND your challenges. What are you good at? What do you enjoy? What is hard for you? What do you not enjoy?
Go to this quiz to help you find out some of your strengths. Also, try new things, experiment, and put yourself there. These are surefire ways to know who you are.
2. Talk to Yourself – Use self-talk to train yourself to be more self-accepting and loving. This simply means making statements to yourself (out loud if needed!) that are positive and supportive like “I am proud of myself for____”.
You can also use kindness when you are disappointed with yourself, such as “Although I lost my patience with that coworker, at least I didn’t raise my voice. I’ll try to be more patient next time.”
3. Re-think Expectations – Take time to think about the standards and “bars” you have set for yourself. Try to write down what your actual expectations may be and ask yourself “Is this reasonable? Do I need to adjust my expectations of myself?”.
It may be that you are putting too much on yourself, which makes it hard for you to accept where you are. Sometimes lowering expectations works wonders.
4. Forgive Yourself – No matter where you are, how much you are disappointed in yourself, or how many unmet expectations you have, it is crucial to practice self forgiveness. Not just once, not just twice, but on an ongoing basis.
Forgiving yourself is what frees you to move on and be your best you.
As you begin to think more about self-love and self-acceptance, I will leave you with another quote by Leo Buscaglia:
“Your greatest responsibilty is to become everything you are, not only for your benefit, but for mine.”
Very deep words, and so very true.
With Love & Healing,
Lynn
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